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Out of My Hands

This morning I watched a truck pull over to the side of the road, an elderly driver got out, walked around to the passengers side while a younger man changed places with him. Interesting. I wondered what made that transition happen? Did the older gentleman decide he shouldn't be driving? Maybe he couldn't see well. Maybe it wasn't his car so he wasn't familiar with how to operate it. Or maybe the younger man was a back seat driver and kept telling the older one how to drive so the older man finally said, “You want to drive? Here you go”. Or maybe it was like the episode in Everyone Loves Raymond where Frank drives so bad they take his keys from him. Maybe the younger one in fear of his life and everyone on the sidewalk just said, “That’s it pull over, I’ll drive!”

I will never know. But it caught my attention as well as my curiosity. I continued to wonder if it was a fight. What was the rest of the ride like for those two? Did they argue and bicker about who should be driving? By the looks of the body language of the older gentleman, he was willing to release control of the wheel. Made me think of the Carrie Underwood song, “Jesus take the wheel.” 

I don’t always want to be in the drivers seat, but honestly I don't always like the way the other person is driving either. So, I back seat drive. I give directions, suggestions and ways I think would be better. Bottom line, I want control of the wheel even when I’m not in control. Which by the way, none of us are in control. Oh, we think we are. We think we can change this or that or convince someone to stop doing that and start doing this. I find myself doing a little more of that lately. 

I never considered myself a control freak but in doing some self examination, turns out I might be a little. I want to control my circumstances, my husband and how he responds to me and I want to control my life. It’s painful to admit and I sense God, being the gentleman that He is, holding up his hands and  saying “Ok, Connie, you want to drive, here you go.”  He lets me drive until I’m either out of gas or I find myself frustrated and somewhere I don't want be. And only then, do I cry out “Jesus take the wheel.”

Why? Why can’t I be more like that older person who just let’s go and voluntarily gives up control of the wheel? Or I do and then two seconds later, I am reaching over and grabbing the wheel again as if it’s my 15 year old driving with his learners permit. God knows what He is doing! He is in complete control. He knows exactly how to operate this vehicle. I am convinced He knows me better than I know myself because He created me. He knows what I need and what I need to stay clear from. He is not only in control but He wants to be in the drivers seat at all times in order to get me where He wants to take me. He knows the safest route. That doesn't mean it will necessarily be the most comfortable route. Sometimes those potholes and detours are exactly what I need in order to remind me that life isn't about me and my comfort. 

It would be in my best interest to release the white knuckle grip I often have on the wheel of my life. God is in control and He is neither nervous or scared of where we are heading. So, I can relax, release the wheel out of my hands and enjoy the journey. 

Pressing On 


“For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb.” Psalm 139:13



‘Then Jesus went to work on his disciples. “Anyone who intends to come with me has to let me lead. You’re not in the driver’s seat; I am. Don’t run from suffering; embrace it. Follow me and I’ll show you how. Self-help is no help at all. Self-sacrifice is the way, my way, to finding yourself, your true self. What kind of deal is it to get everything you want but lose yourself? What could you ever trade your soul for?’ Matthew 16: 24-26

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