Two weeks ago I did the ever so dreaded " step on the scale after a long winter of zero self control". Time to face the music. I really didn't need to step on the scale to have a number verify what I already knew.... The dryer shrunk my clothes. Ok, not true but my clothes aren't fitting like they used to. Time to get back on track and shred those unwanted pounds. Or have to go buy new clothes. For the record this is a cycle I have been on my entire life!
I have to say, since that dreaded scale day; I have been faithful. I've been eating clean ( based on what I determine clean for me not what any extremist says) and I got back to the gym. TWO WEEKS! Typically for me after two weeks I will see results. Mind you I am a little bit older and things ( including my metabolism) have slowed down but still. TWO WEEKS! Sure, I feel better, I'm sleeping better, and a few of my things seem to fit a little better. So I was horrified when I got on the scale and those numbers didn't show the results I wanted to see! Argghh! So discouraging! But I determined I will not let a number define me OR my day. Nor will I cave and throw in the towel, I might however, throw that scale out the window! I'm two weeks into it and I know that perseverance will pay off. Regardless, I know I'm improving whether that stupid scale says so or not. It is not about a number.
On my run today I was thinking about this... Half beating myself up and doing the math in my head. Certainly I must be missing something. Maybe I'm not measuring my portions correctly. Maybe I'm not really burning that many calories..... Blah, blah, blah. I'm doing everything I'm suppose to be doing and the scale stayed the same! Then I thought about how I can do this in my spiritual life as well.
I can get discouraged when I am not seeing results or improvement in an area of my life. How quick I am to do the math in my head and think. " But God, I'm doing A,B, and C and D isn't happening." First of all, my spiritual life isn't a quick fix. I don't ( or shouldn't ) do A,B and C for selfish gain, in order for God to make an area of my life more comfortable or free of pain and suffering. Though that would be nice, it wouldn't be true of God's character. God doesn't promise to fix my problems. He allows me to go though difficult times and circumstances to make me more like Him. My obedience is an act of worship to Him not to earn anything I think I deserve.
I want to serve God and honor Him with my life and the body He gave me in order to serve Him however He sees fit. That made me revisit my motivation for wanting to trim the fat in my life. Both physically and spiritually. I'm so glad that God doesn't ask me to step on a scale to measure my results in either area. He loves me and wants what is best for me. He does want my obedience and I believe He blesses an obedient life. But I also know that He wants my obedience out of gratitude and love for who He is and what He has already done for me.
If D never happens I will choose to continue to follow Him. And I will continue to do A,B and C because I love Him and want to grow closer to Him. I'm so thankful He so patient with me.
-Pressing On
" .... The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” (1 Samuel 16:7 NIV)
"We love because he first loved us." (1 John 4:19 NIV)
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